Latest News

August 24th, 2009

My humor piece, “Bad Farm Fiction” is up at The Haven.

My humor piece, “What Your Favorite Salty Snack Says About You” is up at How Pants Work.

My flash fiction piece, “The Slippery Slope of Novelty Socks” is up at Emrys Journal Online.

My humor piece, “80% of Women are Wearing the Wrong Size Cat” is up at Lady Pieces.

My humor piece, “Paul Hollywood Reviews Classic and Popular Literature” is up at Points in Case.

My humor piece, “How to Make a Chicken out of Tonsils” is up at Down in the Dingle. [Content Note: It’s work-safe, but it’s not weird-safe.]

My humor piece, “The Secrets of Method Acting as Revealed by Patrick’s Dad from the Norwich Union Commercial” is up at The Haven. Because we all need to revisit one of the most famous commercials ever to come out of Canada.

My humour piece, “Withnail & I & the Universal Laws” is up at Dishonourable Unmentionables. [Content Note: Strong language]

My humor piece, “What Kind of Fruit Are You? Take the Quiz!” is up at How Pants Work.

My humor piece, “Proton Station Nectar: Bottle Cap Facts” is up at MuddyUm.

My humor piece, “Rejected Candy Slogans” is up at Weekly Humorist.

My humor piece, “The Most Important Questions to Ask Before Hiring a Cat” is up at The Haven.

My humor piece, “Crummy Biscuits” is up at MuddyUm.

I won an honorable mention the 2020 Lyttle Lytton Contest.

My humor piece, “Thoughts on Finding a Seven-Foot-Tall Giant Plush Hansa Giraffe in the Mastermind Toys Online Catalogue” is up at Funny-ish. [Content Note: Giraffe]

My humor piece, “Dog Person” is up at The Haven.

My humor piece, “Ace That Job Interview with These Helpful Tips!” is up at Down in the Dingle. [Content Note: Cake]

My humor piece, “The Recursive Recursion List” is up at One Minute Wit.

My humor piece, “I Visited the Most Haunted Village in England: I Didn’t See One Freaking Ghost” is up at Points in Case. [Content Note: Language]

My humor piece, “Meditations on Having One’s Boob Flattened During A Mammogram” is up at The Belladonna Comedy.

My humor piece, “Review of New Food: Post Tim Hortons Timbits Cereal” is up at McSweeney’s Internet Tendency.

My humor piece, “When Children Try to Write Adult Fiction” is now up at Points in Case.

My humor piece, “How to Race Pigeons Professionally in Your Living Room” is now live at Slackjaw. [Content Note: This is satire, not actual advice.]

My humor piece, “Best-Selling Items from the M.R. James Collectibles Catalogue” is now available in the Infinite Lives: Short Tales of Longevity (print and ebook) anthology from Third Flatiron Publishing . The full Table of Contents is here.

My humor piece, “Birth Control for the Modern Age” is now up at Lady Pieces.

My non-fiction article, “What Women in Science are Really Wearing These Days (Contrary to What Most ‘Women in STEM’ Posters Would Have You Believe Are Always Lab Coats) OR Things That I Have Actually Worn as an Actual Scientist Doing Actual Science” is now up at Defenestration Magazine.

I’m very pleased to announce that I have won a Dishonorable Mention in the 2019 Bulwer Lytton Fiction Contest. A complete list of the 2019 winners and dishonorable mentions is here.

I’m delighted to announce that I won an Honorable Mention in the 2019 Wergle Flomp Humor Poetry Contest for my poem “Contingency Plans.” A complete list of winners is here.

My article, “Open Letter to the Picture of the Tomato and Cucumber Salad on my Box of Frozen Breaded Fish Fillets” is up at Pickle Fork.

My article, “TLDR Classic Literature” is up at Queen Mob’s Teahouse. [Content Note: swearing. Also insults some beloved classics.]

I am thrilled to announce that my short story, “The Dormer Trees” is a finalist for the 2019 Baen Fantasy Adventure Award. The full announcement and list of finalists is here.

My humor piece, “Top Five Asexual Positions” is online at Little Old Lady Comedy.

My humor piece, “Take the 2nd Annual IQ Smartass Quiz for a Chance to Win a Free Termite!” is now online at Slackjaw.

Cow Key” is up at McSweeney’s Internet Tendency.

My short story, “The River Road, She Rides” was published in the Winter 2019 issue of The New Quarterly.

My instructional article, “Baking for Sadists” is now up at Points in Case. [Content Note: swearing]

My short story “Malleus, Incus, Stapes” was published by Dark Moon Books in the anthology The Five Senses of Horror edited by Eric J. Guignard.